Hi

September 20, 2011… Remember this day? Yes, it was our day. The day I met my world, my life, my everything. After that day, you never fail to let me feel chills with your sweetest words, I admired your smile (even when you’re not saying anything, even just with your simple smile), you supposed to give me not only butterflies in my stomach but damn, all the animals in the zoo. And oh! Remember our first month together? Remember how we could greet each other at exactly 12 in the midnight, face to face, with my friends around us? It was so perfect. Til our second month came, the third, fourth, fifth, sixth, and we even reached our first year anniversary. Remember how we planned for it together? We even saved our money from our baon so we could celebrate September 20, 2012 with my and our friends. But your birthday came and you wanna treat me out for lunch so you spent what you’ve saved. You know what really caught me up right there? I saw how determined you were on celebrating our first anniversary ‘cause I saw thick P50’s when I thought you won’t be able to save. Then we just promised each other that we’ll make the bongga celebration on our 2nd year. Until anniversary came, and remember the My-Amnesia-Girl inspired that I gave you?

Sorry if I wasn’t able to take a photo of the whole of it, but at least I still have this, and I hope you still have that thing. 

You remember these coming from yourself?

• :* :* :* :* :* :* :* :* :* :* :* :* :* du 3 babe hai sa right ,left cheeks ag sa lips . du iba hai sa pimple mo babe :)) ahihi. iloveyou gd.sobra..
• kung aywanan mo ako tao eang.. samad kalibo kun :)
• ako man babe.. d ko kaya.. tag ku 19 nato tandaan mo tag hambae mo aywanan mo un ako.. d gd ako . wa ako naila.. wa ako naila maduea ka kakun kaya ubrahon ko gd tanan para mabalik ka kakun .. yaw ako pag aywane baby uman ha?
• miss ko humton kili2 mo babe :))
• gusto ko ikaw ihug uman babe higpit2 tapus hambae uman ako iloveyou kimo. :((
• aww. babe the best nga monthsary hai kaibahan ta nag sleep :)
• huo babe pag sleep un. iloveyou to infinity and beyond :)
• trust me babe.. ikaw malang akon ag d ko ikaw ibaylo kana. :(
• hai gusto ko man babe ikaw un gd akon. wa un ako naila sa iba ag gusto ko gd ikaw nga ikaw un gd. d man ako magsawa kimo babe
• huo babe. ag babe d ko gusto nga gf ko ikaw.gusto ko un gd asawa ko ikaw :))
• d ta pabay.an baby. gusto ko nge ikaw un gd. kung ma ag2 ako tawagan ko gd ikaw ag d man maduea communication natun babe. ag d man ako magloko. bkn man ako loko2 babe
• haha. d ta ting babe pag buhi.an d ko ikaw lukuhon d ko ikaw ipagpalit sa iba d ko ikaw bastuson basta d ako mag ubra it maeain kimu.
• ihh. d ikaw malipat dun babe :))nami kaya babe tag sa tennis court kita ngato tag ga akbay ako tapus alima mo sa hawak :))

If you want to see more of it, you can go to http://creampuffcoated.tumblr.com and you know the password (clue: woman)

I really miss those days, the ones that believing your words was as easy as drinking water, and I trusted you like I handed you a gun with millions of bullets because I know you won’t shoot me. Did you remember how I met your family and you met mine? The best thing ever! (talking to meeting your family) I keep on praying and praying that someday, I’d stay with them forever. I love them so much. They take care of me more than you don, sorry for this but this is true. Remember how we’d go out with our barkada? We watch concerts, go out at night, remember how I can even lie to Mum and Dad just to be with you? And remember how we’d go home together at Mommy’s late at night when we were from night-outs? The nights we’d sleep together, not minding people around us during concerts ‘cause you’d hug and kiss me at my back, the fireworks displays we’d watch and tell each other that we’d break the belief that lovers who watch fireworks displays together will break-up. Remember the promises we’ve made? That you’d be there for my last 5-6 years (I have a heart disease), we’ll marry each other, we’ll have kids, 2 boys and a girl. I even told you I want to name one boy Aeneas but you didn’t like it ‘cause it sounded like eanas so, okay!

Remember how you were absent on my 18th birthday? But I still felt your presence because you didn’t miss texting and calling me. The way we say, “Dahan ha?” “Huo gapakasae pa kita.” 

How you smell my armpit, our terms of endearment like Baby, Babe, Bibi, Darling, Handsome. The Saturdays and no-class-days when you’d just appear on our gate and me, oh, not yet taken a shower or brushed my teeth. Then you’d cook for our lunch. Our all-time-favorite, egg sandwich right? With patties in them, and Mcdo or Jollibee’s ketchup. Yum!!!

But right now, where we are is just the exact opposite of where we were before. I can’t trust you anymore, not that I can not. I mean, I’m afraid to trust you again. Everything you say becomes lies to me, words that will just be words, once that will never happen. I know before our first or fifth or tenth month, or even our first year anniversary, we’ve been through a hell lot! But I still saw us standing strong, holding each other, still together. But not now anymore. Letting you go was never easy, it was so hard that I have to change everything, my beliefs, point of view, daily routine, the way I speak, how I look like, act, my manners. I even have to change my family and friends’ state of minds. I have to show them that you’re gone and will never ever come back, that you already left me, you already left us. And damn, it was so hard for them. A lot more hard for them.

But I guess it’s just time that we’d let each other go. Let’s come to think that we’re never meant for each other because someone else is meant for you and another is meant for me. Let’s realize that certain things can be perfect sometimes, that we’d think they’re falling into their right places when in fact, they’re just temporary. And like Lola said, “We’re young; we still have a lot to give, people to meet, and there’s a better world out there waiting for us.” Just let things be. I guess they were right when they said love is facing your biggest fears. This one’s the biggest, letting go of someone you love who you thought was your world, your life, your everything. Never say “Iya malang ako.” again because you’re not. Okay? Don’t try to tell me again “Kung magkita kita pwede mueo.an kita? Ako mat’a gauna.” because you won’t. Okay? And please stop everything, everything. September 20 is over, 20’s are over. I hope you’d find your true love. When that day comes, yes I’d be hurt, but you deserve to be happy. Not with me, but with someone else…

Cirio F. Terencio, Jr.

My friends and family will hate me for this pero yes, gusto ta gihapon istoryahon. Damn you :( gusto ko gihapon piliton ka istoryahon ako tapos kutan-on ka ano problema mo tapos du finale nga sayod eun natin daywa, ayuson ko gihapon kita. Mausoy gihapon ako it way para maayos tanan. Ibalik ko gihapon kita. That’s how hurt i am right now :( ag since gani nga every second lang duyon gina isip ko, nga ga deepen dun habang ga buhay, I’m still that determined nga someday, magbaliskad gid dun tanan. “In every action, there’s always an opposite reaction.” Someday usuyon mo gid du bayi nga gatao kimo tanan, ubrahon tanan ma satisfy ka eang, di bale eun maglagpas ako sa limits basta ikaw okay ka. Tapos mabalik ka kakon ag ako indi eun, promise :( someday makita mo ako nga happier, or even happiest, then you’ll see what you’ve been missing out. Sayod mo until now gusto ko mamati cng explanation, pero i know indi eun to matabo :( you left me with a cue of “Cannot be reached.” And you just don’t know how it messed me up til now. Pero bisan duyon gin ubra mo kang, I miss you, so much :(

One day makita ta with or without someone new, yes I’ll get hurt. Pero you’ll be hurt 100x more. I swear :(

I love your family. Kasakit eang nga pati snda mapaeayo dahil cng inubra when in fact, uwa ka man it reason para mag makaron.

The times you wiped my tears when I cry in front of you, the way you held my hand when I’m silent, when you thrill me with just a kiss on my forehead. Nahidlaw na ako :(((((((((